Aaron Spears, Me & Eric Moore II |
SATURDAY
17.11.12
DRUMMERS FOR JESUS LA
TWO YEAR ANNIVERSARY
TWO YEAR ANNIVERSARY
Today I had the humbling opportunity to be a featured clinician at Drummers For Jesus LA's two-year anniversary, hosted by Ronald Bruner Sr.
Alongside two incredible drummers, Eric Moore II and Gorden Campbell, I, the obvious oddball in the group, was given the terrifying challenge of not only relating to an audience I had never come across, but somehow playing something interesting AFTER George Duke's drummer and BEFORE a Drum-Off Champion!
In the weeks leading up to this event, I was more than intimidated- almost to the point of pulling out of the gig. It was a real angel/devil-on-your-shoulder experience:
ANGEL// You can do it!
DEVIL\\ no you can't
ANGEL// You're an accomplished drummer!
DEVIL\\ not accomplished enough
ANGEL// You may not have a lot of chops, but you have groove!
DEVIL\\ they have better groove PLUS tons of chops
ANGEL// You're going to kill it!
DEVIL\\ it's going to kill you
ANGEL// Don't listen to her... she's just jealous... and sunburned!
DEVIL\\ hey!
I don't know if they kept on... I imagine they're still squabbling about it to some degree- along with all of my other insecurities. However, at a certain point I just had to stop listening to either of them and start figuring out for myself what I needed to do.
Recently I took a great bit of advice from the book Bossypants, by Tina Fey:
"If you can't make a decision, just stall and wait until the answer presents itself." -Lorne Michaels
Though logistically terrifying, this is how I wound up deciding to do the clinic- not deciding at all! In affect, just waiting until it was too impolite to say no made my yes decision for me. So there I was, committed. Now all that was left to was to prepare my tracks, pray for grace and do the dang thing!
In the days leading up to the clinic I kept being reminded of a song I used to sing at church when I was a teenager:
"Humble thyself in the sight of the Lord,
And He will lift you up, higher and higher."
It's not particularly profound just reading this, I know- it's not even that profound when you add a melody to it! In fact, it seems that unless you are in a place of really being able to relate to it, these simple words are just meaningless.
I've found this to be true of most biblical principles- the verses, phrases and clichés that are repeated the most tend to erode into white noise. Just like when you were a kid and you'd said the same word over and over again- it's just a familiar sound out of context. Well, I'm grateful to say that in my moments just before the clinic, I found my context.
I set up between Eric and Gorden, literally center stage, at the Youth Activities Center of Crenshaw Christian Center and felt smaller than ever- Smallest person on stage with the smallest kit and the smallest amount of self confidence. It was in that moment that I realized in the purest form, what humility was. The ability to stand at ladybug height in a land full of giants. This lady stood tall, blessed to be in a room full of so much greatness, including a surprise guest, Mr. Aaron Spears.
The clinic itself was informal and incredibly intimate.
Gorden spoke passionately about musicality, vocabulary and authenticity- while giving props to all the greats from Joel Smith to Gerald Hayward to the late, great, Marvin McQuitty.
Ron gave testimony to God's grace in a time when he was addicted to drugs, saying "I heard a voice tell me, 'you ain't gonna live much longer'- But Jesus interrupted that!"
Eric told a story of how after winning the drum-off, his newly inflated ego caused him to start disrespecting his parents and chase church paychecks instead of being humble with the gifts God had blessed him with.
Somewhere in the middle of all this glory, it was my turn to go.
After sharing about my life and how my career started, I played a song called Khail's Cry that I wrote with a band called The Moment Sound. It was half great and half shameful, because my track was mixed with the click BLARING in the house. Jokingly, I told the crowd, "This is what a day in the studio is like!"
I really could've sworn not but 2 minutes before I took the stage, that no one would care about who I was or what I did- that no one would ask questions or connect to my story or my playing. Well, after I played, I was excited to be so wrong!
I had the opportunity to answer thoughtful questions and receive some positive & constructive feedback. However, my favorite part was having a father ask me to pray over his little boy, Markis, an aspiring young drummer. Aaron, Eric, Ron & I laid hands on this little man, professing that he would be a leader in his generation- focused, passionate and true to the calling on his life.
The days and moments leading up to this event found me analyzing and overanalyzing what I thought I believed about success, and about being a servant of God in this industry. And this is the conclusion I've come to:
We tend to think that when we make it, it's God's way of rewarding us for being responsive to the calling on our lives- like He's letting us off the hook, in a way. On the contrary, I believe that after we have been responsible with our talents, we become responsible for the sphere of influence that those talents draw to our lives.
So I guess what I'm trying to say is, "With great power comes great responsibility."
Thanks, Spiderman's Uncle Ben! It took you 6 words to say what took me 940. Jeesh!
I'll be more concise next time, gang. Thanks for hangin' in there with me!
Special thanks to Trevor Clinard, Sarah Armstrong & Coleen York for helping me launch this bad boy.
/seevaldrum
TAMA-ZILDJIAN-EVANS-PROMARK-ROLAND-TOCA
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